Pfizer has reassigned its team of anti-aging researchers to focus on enhancing the formula of its popular erectile dysfunction drug, Viagra. The move has been attributed to the need to better compete with cheaper generic versions of the medication.
“We were getting close to some real breakthroughs in terms of extending human life and curing age related disease, ” said one of their lead scientists on the program. “But instead, we’ll have to settle for better boner pills.”
“With the rise of generic versions of Viagra, we felt that we needed to do more to differentiate ourselves,” said a Pfizer spokesperson. “Instead of an erection that only lasts two hours, we think we can increase that to at least 14 to 18 hours.”
The move has left some medical experts feeling frustrated, as they believe that Pfizer should be focusing on more pressing medical issues.
“It’s disappointing to see a company like Pfizer, which has the resources and expertise to make a real difference in the fight against age-related diseases, prioritizing the enhancement of a drug that’s already widely available,” said one medical expert, who asked to remain anonymous. “But erectile dysfunction is where the real money is.”
Despite the criticism, Pfizer is pushing ahead with its plans to enhance Viagra’s formula and create even longer and harder erections for men.
“Our goal is to provide the biggest hardest erections,” said the Pfizer spokesperson. “That’s what’s the world needs most right now.”
While some may argue that the resources would be better spent on finding cures for age-related diseases, Pfizer is confident that enhancing Viagra’s formula will have a significant impact on men’s lives.
“If we succeeded in reversing aging, erectile dysfunction might be a thing of the past,” said the Pfizer spokesperson. “We can’t take that risk.”
As Pfizer’s anti-aging researchers continue to work on the enhancement of Viagra, some in the medical community remain hopeful that the company will eventually shift its focus to more pressing medical issues. But for now, it seems that Pfizer’s top priority is staying competitive in the market for erectile dysfunction drugs.
