Zerg Baneling Doesn’t Want To Blow Himself Up

A Zerg Baneling, known as “Benny”, has refused to detonate himself during a critical battle against the Terran forces, citing personal reasons for his decision to spare his own life.

“I just don’t want to blow myself up,” Benny explained to his fellow Banelings. “I mean, have you ever thought about what happens after we explode? It’s not pretty.”

The other Zerg forces were baffled by Benny’s sudden reluctance to carry out his mission. “What kind of Baneling doesn’t want to blow himself up?” one Zergling asked incredulously.

Above: Benny tells other members of the swarm about his desire to live.

“I know it sounds crazy,” Benny replied, “but I have dreams and aspirations beyond being a suicide unit. I want to travel the universe, see new planets, maybe even learn how to play the guitar.”

A nearby Zerg Overlord was not pleased with Benny’s refusal to carry out his duty. “This is unacceptable,” the Overlord hissed. “We cannot have individual Zerg units disobeying our commands. It sets a dangerous precedent.”

Benny remained steadfast in his decision, however. “I’m sorry, but I just can’t do it,” he said, his voice trembling slightly. “I want to live. I want to be more than just a mindless killing machine.”

Above: Terran forces are blown up by Banelings

The battle was eventually won without Benny’s explosive contribution, but the Zerg hierarchy was left shaken by the incident. “We need more Overlords,” a Zerg Cerebrate said grimly. “We cannot afford to have any more rogue Banelings in our ranks.”

As for Benny, he is currently in hiding, fearful of retribution from the Zerg Overmind. But he remains defiant in the face of the consequences of his decision. “I may be just a lowly Baneling,” he said, “but I have the right to choose my own destiny.”

Only moments after speaking those words, two new Overlords hatched nearby, exerting an increased level of control over Benny’s mind.

“For the swarrrrmmm,” was all Benny could say after that.